How to be a Confident Woman: 6 Killer Ways to Build Confidence

I want to take this expensive course, but I’m scared… Have you struggled with a lack of confidence in yourself too? When you have something ahead of you that’s overwhelming or scary, it can be so easy to slip into a state where you don’t believe in yourself and your abilities enough. I want to encourage you in this post and share with you how to be a confident woman even when you have doubts.

By the end of this post, you’ll feel confident because you’ll learn to turn to past accomplishments to help you remember how capable you are, allowing you to tackle your next venture with more assurance.

This is a special post, too! It’s an “ask the readers” post! This means I pose a thoughtful question, share my thoughts, and then leave it to you to share your thoughts in the comments! It’s a beautiful way to get to know each other a bit better and create a real sense of community here on the Thriving and Inspiring blog!

So here’s the question we’ll be considering today:

What’s an accomplishment of yours you never believed was possible?

And here’s the problem we’re seeking to answer or solve:

Not believing in yourself enough / lacking confidence to tackle your next big thing.

This post may contain affiliate links which means I’ll receive a commission if you purchase through my links, at no extra cost to you. Please read full disclosure for more information.

I Never Thought I Could, But I Did! My Experience Accomplishing Something I Thought I Couldn’t

Let’s start with an example, and my answer to the question we’re considering:

What’s an accomplishment of yours you never believed was possible?

First, here are some of the accomplishments I’m proud of in my life so far:

• Graduating college with a degree I’m super interested in
• Getting married and buying a home
• Trying something totally new and different by creating this blog
• Maintaining a healthy lifestyle for over 5 years
• Getting out of debt, paying off my car

I Never Thought I’d be able to Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle

I’ll share some more deets about how I started and maintained a healthy lifestyle. I’m sharing this with you because I believe reminiscing about past accomplishments in life is one of the best ways to build confidence when it’s waning and you really need it to move forward!

All my life, and through most of college, I ate what the typical American eats. I didn’t have a super health-conscious mindset. And while I wasn’t eating fast food every night, health and wellness were not on my radar at all!

I honestly never thought I’d be a spokeswoman for health and healthy living! I didn’t really think it was possible for me to change my ways from eating a whole huge bag of gummy bears every time I went to the movies, and having a big ol’ bowl of Turkey Hill Double Dunker ice cream every night.

My habits were pretty locked down, eat whatever I want, whenever I want! And I didn’t think it was really possible to change my ways.

Fast forward to when my stretchiest leggings were digging into my belly (I’ve already shared that experience and my tips for exercising), and I had the urge to do something about my eating habits.

Time for a Lifestyle Change

I’d had enough of being uncomfortable and feeling crappy because the food I was giving myself was crappy!

I slowly started making healthier meal choices. (More here on how and why I gave up dairy.) Nothing crazy, just a few small changes at a time. I started shopping for myself even though I still lived at home at the time (I have tips for how to shop healthy when your household isn’t on the same page).

Then I started sectioning off 20 minutes a day to get some movement in. I started with JCore, and loved it because it was super quick and I knew which video to do each day.

Then I did P90X. I loved both and these programs were great to get my butt into gear. And once I started to get in the groove, I let myself discover other ways of moving that I really liked!

I got into Pilates and absolutely loved it!! I used Fitness Blender to select daily Pilates videos.

Then I tried out HIIT (I’ve already written much about all of these kinds of exercises) and did that for a while intermixed with Pilates.

From there, I dipped my toes into strength training and that really resonated! I enjoyed this type of exercise so much and found myself looking forward to exercising for the first time in my life.

I also tried my hand at running and yoga. And now, I do quite a mix of all of these things depending on what my body is feeling on any given day.

Aaaaall of this to say, I never thought it would be possible to become a “workout girl” but, years later, I’ve written a whole guide on different types of exercise to help other beginners!

And I never thought I’d be knowledgeable enough to write and share things like:

• What I Eat in a Day and Why + 6 Tips for Healthy Eating
• 15 Unique Healthy Snack Ideas that are Guilt-Free & Minimal Prep
• 3 Easy, Need-to-Know Changes to Start Eating Healthy
• Going Dairy Free: An Honest Talk About Bloating

Way back when, I never would have thought I’d have accomplished such a healthy lifestyle since I loved sweets so much and didn’t really care about wellness.

The whole point of sharing this is to remind you how important it is when you’re lacking the confidence to do something to call back to times when you’ve accomplished something big! 

Remembering past successes and wins can really help you uncover confidence to do the next scary or big thing!

My Thoughts about How to Be a Confident Woman

I like to think I’m a pretty confident gal. But sometimes, I still have those seeds of doubt in my brain. And when I’m lacking confidence, here’s what I do…

It’s Helpful to Consider Past Accomplishments to Remind Yourself You’re Capable

You can remember your greatest accomplishments or even your small wins by doing the things below.

1. Journaling to Build Self-Confidence

Grab a journal and just start to list everything that comes to mind when you think of accomplishments or wins you’ve had in the past.

Brain Dump

Jotting down every single thought is called a brain dump. I like this strategy for remembering accomplishments and wins because it allows you to write unfiltered. Sometimes it’s the random, maybe even insignificant wins that really motivate you!

How to Become a Confident Woman Using Journal Prompts

Try any (or all, if you’re feeling sassy) of these journal prompts to get your juices flowing to remember your accomplishments in life:

• What are you most proud of in life?
• What’s your most recent small win?
• What have you worked really hard on in your life?
• What do other people congratulate you on?
• What would your mom/dad/significant other/best friend say they’re proud of you for?
• List the common compliments you get from others.
• List your greatest attributes.
• Write about a time when you worked really hard on something and it paid off.
• Write about a time when you felt honored to receive an award or praise.
• What do you consider your biggest accomplishment?
• What have you discovered about yourself from your last failure?
• What have you achieved that took a long time?

The beautiful thing about journaling is there are really no rules! You can write as much or as little as you want. You can write in list form with bullets or paragraph form. There’s no need to use proper punctuation or even spell everything right.

Your responses are just for you! So write freely, openly, and honestly. If you could only see all the spelling mistakes in my journal!

BONUS: Worksheets and prompts for strong, independent women!

Snatch the guided journal prompts to discover what brings you joy and how to become confident and independent.

Be sure to check your spam and promotional folders in your email for the download.

2. Asking a Loved One

Recently I got it in my head that I didn’t have any hobbies. I panicked and had a quarter-life crisis because I couldn’t think of things I loved and enjoyed off the top of my head. So I started a list in my phone.

Every time I thought of something I love or that brings me joy, I wrote it down. After about 5 or 6 entries, I was stumped for any more. So I took it to a loved one.

I asked my husband, “Hey what do I love?” And he immediately responded with 2 things that hadn’t even crossed my mind. But he was spot on! 

My point here is to take it to your loved ones! 

Family and friends have an outside perspective that you don’t have and will be able to identify certain accomplishments and successes and wins that you may not be able to recall!

I’ve already written about how to find the right people on the blog too.

3. Create a “Wins” Note in Your Phone

Similar to above how I mentioned that I created an ongoing list, a living document, in my phone of things I love, you can do the same for accomplishments.

This way you have a running list of things you’ve accomplished and can look at when you need a little encouragement. You can reference this list when you’re wondering how to be a confident woman, especially when you’ve got something around the bend that’s big and nerve-wracking. 

Just add to your “wins” list when things come to mind!

4. Put Visual Reminders in Your Environment

You’ve heard of a vision board, right? You could also make a collage that highlights your biggest successes down to your smallest wins! Then you could hang it up somewhere in your house as a visual reminder of all the things you’ve done, so when you’re lacking confidence, it can give you a boost!

You can also harness the power of visual reminders by displaying items that represent your accomplishments. When I was in middle school, I proudly hung my science fair ribbons in my room as a reminder that- “Hey, I did something really hard!”

5. Act Like and Be the Girl Who’s Already Done the Thing!

My last tip for how to be a confident woman is to simply act like the girl who’s already done that thing you’re scared of or worried about.

You see, here, I’m trying to help you build confidence specifically when you’ve got something scary or intimidating or overwhelming in front of you.

So- try this: act like you’ve already accomplished it!

Go about your day acting like the girl who’s already accomplished that big thing you’ve got ahead of you.

For me, right now this looks like me going about each day acting like I’ve taken the jump and signed up for that expensive course. It looks like me acting like I’m confident!

The whole “faking it til you make it” is honestly the way to go sometimes. It doesn’t quite get you all the way there, but it’s a start in the right direction! Sometimes a little fake confidence is all you need to get the ball rolling.

6. Try Visualizing Yourself Doing That Hard Thing That’s Ahead of You

Take it one step further and visualize yourself having already done the thing! This may sound silly, but visualization is actually backed by a lot of science!  

Share Your Experience Accomplishing Something Big

Now, I want to hear from you!

The reason for this post is to ask YOU! I want to hear what accomplishments you have that propel you forward and give you the confidence to take on the next thing!

When we share and story tell like this, we add so much value and a sense of community to each other’s lives. We can learn from each other, connect, ask questions, and relate!

In the comment section below, I’d be honored if you’d share:

1. What’s an accomplishment of yours you never believed was possible?
2. What thing do you need the confidence to do? (What’s scaring you/ahead of you that you need confidence for?)

I hope that thinking back to past accomplishments in life will help you if you’re wondering how to be a confident woman! I hope you realize all that you’ve accomplished and that you can do it again!

Focus on your capabilities and that you’ve done hard and scary things before!

You’ve got this.

Comment below to share your thoughts, experience, and tips of your own!